As I sat across from another first time Mum, we exchanged stories, our wins, some of our lows and decisions we’ve made. I couldn’t help but notice the way we seemed to keep feeling the need to justify the choices and decisions we have made in how we parent.

It got me thinking about the pressure that we as Mum’s put on ourselves and that society reinforces. I believe this to be true for women in general more than men, however for this specific train of thought I am focusing on Mums.

There is no right way

What I realise now 9 months into being a parent of a child (outside of me, I became a parent really the moment I discovered I was pregnant, but I digress!) is that there is no perfect way, there is no right way, there is only our way. What works for you, your baby and your household!!

What there is

Is plenty of judgement from others, well-meaning advice (that isn’t always helpful), endless loops of Mum guilt and a gazillion videos on the internet about how too much (Insert your poison) is guaranteed to give your baby some ailment.

I found myself almost watching a video on YouTube the other day that had a heading along the lines of ‘The daily mistakes parents make that destroys your child emotionally.’ I stopped the video before it really got going as I knew that watching it was not going to make me feel good about myself.

I am so over it.

I’ve had several conversations recently and observed this same thing, we are defending out position, justifying our choices and trying to demonstrate why we made the best possible call for our child.

And you know what – I am getting so over it.

As mums we have a million things to handle and all the extra guilt that society and that we pile onto ourselves doesn’t help anyone.

So, my gorgeous Mama reading this, this is your reminder (and mine) that you are doing a great job.

This is your permission slip to let that damn guilt go.

We are all doing the best we can with what we have.

And you know what. That is enough! That is okay!

There are no rules, there are no ways that this parenting thing needs to be done.

So today, let’s lay down the guilt and let’s tell anyone who makes us feel different (including ourselves) that we are doing it our way and that is that! Sorry not sorry!

A practice to release expectation.

As I wrote this letter, a practice by Lisa Nicholas popped into my head. I’ll share with you and perhaps you’ll find it useful.

It is a daily practice she uses as a way to release external expectations, quieten that unhelpful inner voice and step into her authentic power. She looks into the mirror and says:

I have nothing to hide.

I have nothing to prove.

I have nothing to defend.

Now…who do I choose to be?

What a powerful question ‘Now…who do I choose to be?’

The beauty is, we can choose to be exactly who we want to be, and we can choose how we want to parent!

Step into it. Own it and Reader be unapologetic in it.

You are doing a fantastic job. Especially on the really hard days.

You got this!

With so much love and respect for you.

💛 Emma

P.S. What is one piece of Mum guilt you hold that you're saying bye bye baby to? Hit reply and share with me. I read every response and I genuinely want to know.